Word Club Part Two Cont.

‘I am concerned for Janet, Rudy. And for Jim.’
Rudy stood in his customary place behind the front desk, puzzled and surprised.
‘I believed that they were doing quite well, sir. I was not aware that there was cause for concern.’
‘Do you know what is happening this very moment?’
‘I believe I do, sir. Janet has just disappeared by becoming one with the trees, and Jim has just begun his march with the battle clan.’
‘You know as well as I do that what happens in the ‘Word Club’, as we have chosen to call it, is real. The people are real, the creatures of the wild are real, and the forces at work throughout the inner- and outer- world of the Word Club are real.
‘Yes, sir, I do’.
‘You know, then, that the danger is also real. The risks, the possibilities- both wonderful and terrible- are real. While it is possible for one to create conceivably anything, it is a given that creatures, people, and inherent forces, once created, will think and act for themselves. Do you understand, Rudy?’
‘I do, sir.’
‘Both Janet and Jim are, I believe, under the impression that while they can be hurt here, they are not in any real danger- that they are virtually invulnerable in the Word Club. I know you have given them a warning or two, phrased pleasantly for their benefit, but they still seem to view the Word Club as their own little playground; an all-new jungle gym, built just yesterday for their personal amusement. How long has our little club been around, Rudy?’
‘For over two hundred thirty years, sir, under various names and guises.’
‘Precisely. Over two centuries of new ideas, all growing and expanding on top of one another, with nothing to hinder the growth. That is the amount of wildness we are dealing with. That is the amount Janet and Jim have unwittingly begun to open themselves to- Janet in particular.’
‘What can I do to help, sir?’
The Perpetuator nodded, once. ‘We need you to take up the role we once had you set aside. We need you to go in again, as one of them. We still count you as our foremost field agent. You will need every bit of your experience, every ounce of your savvy to guide them through the rest of this, their second experience in the Word Club. We need you to leave now, this very moment, if you would.’
‘As you wish, sir’.
His eyes shining, Rudy left his place behind the front desk and approached the opposing wall. A most curious circular picture hung there. Within the smooth golden frame, molten silver flowed, running in an endless whirlpool of glowing color. Never did a single drop of the liquid metal fall out of the golden frame. Rudy stood still, gazing steadily, unblinkingly. After a moment of this the whirlpool stilled, and Rudy beheld a group of broad-shouldered, hard-faced men marching down a hillside. Another moment, and they were out of sight, the sound of their marching feet gradually fading away.
Still he gazed, allowing himself to take in the now-quiet scene. All seemed still at the top of the hill, among the trees. Rudy allowed his eyes to lose their focus, everything becoming blurred. For a moment longer everything was still, and then he caught it- movement just at the edge of his vision. He could not have said whether it was inside or outside the frame, for he did not turn to look; instead, he stayed as he was, in the same relaxed state. Steadily, the entire hidden scene began to unfold before him, and he saw where Janet now was.
She was not alone.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Choice

Once again total war fully fills me within
Much more and I feel I will die.
I search for some window, no matter how small
I can’t breathe, I can’t sweat, I can’t cry!
What path can I take to find my release?
I have not the power to Mend
…One by one, angels beautiful come to my side
A most bittersweet chance to lend.
Meetings past I recall, they were not in this guise-
I merely saw damsels sublime.
Now I hear their thoughts, a heart- wrenching choice
They are here, to tell me, is mine.
I can keep on my path, continue this course-
Endure my own thoughts till I’m through,
Or I can be altered, no longer myself
Unable to grow, always new.
What a terrible choice! Forever a babe-
Never growing, never thinking- no pain.
Or always growing, and ever hurting,
Fearing that I’ll go insane!
If I stay it may kill me, but my life will be real
If I leave, there’s no chance I’ll return…
"There are those who will need you, should you choose to stay;
Vital lessons you’ll help them to learn."
I cannot choose! I wish for both!
I want to grow out my heart.
I am eager to love, yet I feel deep inside
That so doing will tear me apart!
Paralyzed to inaction- they make my choice:
Gathering linen shining white,
Slowly, gently, they wrap me within
Until I am engulfed by the light.
Just before I am gone they whisper
"Someday you again may live
When you can take the wondrous love within
And every part of it give…"

Yes

‘Yes,’ she says to me.
‘You have done great things.
You have endured trials, troubles,
And tribulations too.
You have also made many mistakes,
Though you have tried to rectify them
As best you could.
After it is all said and done,
What do you want now,
At the end of it all?’
‘I just want it over,’
I say as the tears spill
Down my cheeks.
‘Please, can’t it be over?’
‘It is not for me to say.
It is for God to decide
When to take you Home.
You will have to wait upon Him.’
‘I have been waiting for so long already.
My heart is breaking. I feel that I cannot
Bear this much longer before I break altogether.’
‘Perhaps that is what he is waiting for:
A broken heart and a contrite spirit.’
‘It hurts,’ I say to her.
‘It hurts so much to live.
I don’t understand why
I must go through this.’
‘I do not know either,’
She replies somewhat sadly.
‘I do know that you just have to keep going,
No matter what, and you will win the prize.’
‘Please,’ I cry. ‘Will you pray with me?’
‘I have been praying with and for you all along.
I will pray with you now, as well.’

A Broken Heart

‘Yes,’ she says to me.
‘You have done great things.
You have endured trials, troubles,
And tribulations too.
You have also made many mistakes,
Though you have tried to rectify them
As best you could.
After it is all said and done,
What do you want now,
At the end of it all?’
‘I just want it over,’
I say as the tears spill
Down my cheeks.
‘Please, can’t it be over?’
‘It is not for me to say.
It is for God to decide
When to take you Home.
You will have to wait upon Him.’
‘I have been waiting for so long already.
My heart is breaking. I feel that I cannot
Bear this much longer before I break altogether.’
‘Perhaps that is what He is waiting for:
A broken heart and a contrite spirit.’
‘It is always ‘perhaps,’ isn’t it?
I never seem to know for sure.
I need to know how much longer
I must stay here.’
‘And what will you do once you know?’
‘If it is very soon, I shall cry in relief.
If it is not, I shall crumble in despair.
Nothing else seems to matter anymore.’
‘You must not give up hope, Adam!
Have there not been many signs
That your time is soon?
Have there not been many signs
Telling you that you don’t need to worry?’
‘My faith, perhaps, is not what it needs to be.
I have stumbled greatly. Now I doubt myself.’
‘Trust in God,’ she says to me. ‘He will make
Up the difference where you lack.’
‘I am trying to do so,’ I reply.
‘We are waiting for you when you are done.
Just keep trying for a little longer, and then
We shall be there to get you Home.’
‘Home,’ I sigh. ‘It is nearly impossible to wait.’

Word Club Part Two

Jim stared a moment longer at the computer screen, then sat back and rubbed his eyes.
‘Ben, do you want anything? I need a break.’
‘I wouldn’t say no to a couple glazed, Jim. Thanks.’
‘Alright.’
Jim made his way out of his cubicle, heading toward the coffee table and thinking.
I haven’t been able to focus on much of anything today. The smallest noise seemed to distract him lately. It had been growing all week, and today he could scarcely think straight.
Jim sighed. It was time to rectify the situation.
I’ll call Janet at lunch. She’s been wanting to go back since the moment we left.
‘Here you go, Ben. Enjoy.’
‘Oh boy. Just what I needed. Thanks, Jim.’
‘No problem.’
I hope we don’t have a disease or something. Barely a week past and it’s all either of us can think about.
* * * * * * * * * * * *
The bell jingled as the door opened.
‘Is that new?’ Jim wondered idly.
‘It wasn’t here last week,’ Janet replied.
They walked toward the front desk.
Rudy smiled brightly. ‘Welcome back to the Word Club, sir, madam. Would you like anything before you begin?’
‘I think we’re ready as is, Rudy. Thanks all the same, though.’
‘In that case, I will direct your attention to the large vault door set in the right hand wall just down the hallway behind me.’
‘A vault door, Rudy?’
‘Yes sir. Do you see it there?’
‘I do see it, yes.’
‘As with all things in this world we live in, the Word Club is in a state of constant change. Thus, the method of entering the inner world of the Word Club is also one of constant change.’
Jim and Janet both nodded.
‘I understand.’
‘That makes sense, Rudy.’
‘In order for you to enter the inner Word Club on your visit today, you will require both the practical application of the intellect you possess, and the unrestrained allowance of your intuition. It is these tools that allow true creativity to flow. Are you ready?’
‘Yes,’ they said together.
‘Then I will ask you to approach that vault door.’
Jim and Janet walked up to the doorframe.
‘And now it is up to you to find your way through it.’
They looked into each others eyes for a moment, and then smiled. Janet put her ear and her hand to the vault door. Jim began to turn the dial slowly.
‘Keep going, keep going…stop! Now back the other way, slowly… stop! Now to the right again…there!’ Janet paused, as though puzzled. ‘This has to be the strangest vault system ever made. I think we need to push the dial in.’
Jim shrugged. He pushed on the dial, and it began to recede into the door. Jim kept pushing, until there was a faint click, and then a great whoosh as the door swung inward away from them, into the inner Word Club.
For a moment both Janet and Jim simply stood in the doorway, breathing in the freshness of the air, their hearts becoming light with relief.
‘That was the longest week of my life, I think,’ Jim said, almost gasping the words.
‘I told you we needed to come back,’ Janet smiled.
‘You were right. I can breathe freely again.’
‘We can breathe freely again,’
‘Yes, we.’
Jim gently took her face in his hands. ‘Yes,’ he repeated. ‘You have freed us again, dear lady. For so great a gift, I thank you.’
After a moment Janet gently ended the kiss. ‘Come, my love. Let us explore this wondrous world once more!’
And so they lost themselves in the glorious wild. Together they ran through endless fields, climbed the highest mountains, braved the thickest jungles, and swam the deepest rivers. Jim defended Janet from the wild animals that roamed the land. He learned to fight the bear, the wolf, and the mountain lion. Janet learned the lore of the plants, the grass and the trees, for at times Jim lay close to death after his battles, and Janet spent many days in nursing her fallen warrior back to health.
In their wanderings, they saw exotic creatures, strange beasts, and beautiful birds. It was a world filled with colors and tastes and smells that were new to them, and they eagerly immersed themselves in it.
They began to see other humans, far in the distance and out of earshot. Jim was certain they were seen, though they were not approached. But one day they came to a new change. Janet sensed it in the air when she awoke, and quickly she went to Jim and shook him. Jim opened his eyes.
‘What is it, my lady?’
‘My love, warriors approach. I feel their anger and desire for battle. They come for you.’
‘I will defend you, lady, as I have done before.’
‘They wish you to fight for them, not against them.’
Jim could see them now, sixty warriors cresting a near hill to the south. Within his heart, he felt the desire to fight. Jim looked in Janet’s hazel eyes. ‘I do not wish to leave you, my lady. Bid me stay and I will stay.’
Janet shook her head. ‘It is not for me to stay you, my love. I bid you go. I will be near.’
‘How can I go, lady, when my heart lies with you?’
‘I will always be near. It is in you to fight. Fight, but fight for love. Fight for love, and you will be stronger, and swifter, your energy greater, your battle-heart fiercer. Be strong, my love.’
Insistently, honey lips pressed against his own. Then Janet seemed to fade. The trees began to appear through her skin; Jim could see the faint outlines of the leaves behind her, the grass through the skin of her ankles, the long-stemmed flowers swaying gently in the breeze. First they were merely hints, and then strong outlines, and finally her body was all but gone, all but her eyes, still staring into his own. For a moment they gazed, then they, too, were gone as the war band began their ascent up the hill. They halted at the crest. Only the war chieftain walked further, who came within ten feet of where Jim stood.
He looked at Jim warily for a moment, then spoke. ‘We need your help, wild one. Our enemy will long be at our hearth-doors this season. You will be one with us. One in name, one in heart, one in anger, one in spirit, one in strength, one in power, one in war. Fight with us!’
‘I will fight with you.’

Untitled

Here I stand, ready, the cliff’s edge before my feet.
In my hands are the charred remains, the book of my heart.
Below are the cities wherein I have lived, prisoner in them all.
I am through; I will give the ghost of my love to the world
And then, I will give my soul
Slowly, I run the book, mere disconnected, blackened sheets in my hands
Pieces begin to fall. Tears fall with them; it always hurts to share myself.

Word Club

The Word Club, Part One

Jim peered up at the neon sign in puzzlement.
‘Janet honey, are you sure this is the right place?’
Janet looked at him askance. ‘Of course I’m sure. I entered ‘Breeding ground for the world’s most creative minds’ on the web, and this was top of the list. “A 24/7 symposium for all topics, genres, perspectives, persuasions, opinions, questions and answers relating to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, as interpreted by any patrons past, present, and future.’”
‘Past, present, and future? How can they possibly-’
‘If we’re going to try this, Jim, we have to take it on their terms.’
‘They? Who’s ‘they?’’
‘The creators of this place. They refer to themselves as The Perpetuators. Not the most engaging title, I admit.’
‘Sounds a bit sophomoric to me.’
‘Like I said, we have to take it on their terms.’
‘Rather broad terms, I should think,’ Jim shrugged. ‘Ah well. Let’s go for it.’
The door swung smoothly in at Jim’s push.
‘Good evening, sir. Good evening, madam. My name is Rudy. Welcome to The Word Club, where every creative intelligence is welcome. While you are here, it will be necessary for you to abide by our rulebook.’
That’s very-
‘Blunt, sir. I realize it is, but it is imperative for your personal well-being that you do not cross the invisible threshold that runs throughout this establishment. I will now impart the rulebook to you.’
Did he just read my mind?
‘Section One, Subsection One, Regulations, Chapter One, Paragraph One, Rule One. “No patron or patrons will do anything, say anything, or create anything that has the potential to limit the creative juices in themselves and/ or other patrons with whom they may interact while within the perimeter of this, The Word Club.” That is the short version, sir, madam. The remainder of the Rulebook merely expounds upon the particulars which stem from the first rule. Should you be concerned that you will have surrendered your rights by agreeing to this rule, you are welcome to read over the entire rulebook when it is not in use.’ Rudy gestured to a dimly-lit table, set in an alcove to the couple’s right. A well dressed, balding man sat there, peering intently at the left page of what seemed to be an immense volume; so immense, that neither Janet nor Jim could see the end of it.
‘Is that a state senator? Our state senator?’ Jim asked, bewildered.
‘He doesn’t look very happy, does he? Why would the freedom to be creative make him unhappy?’
‘If I were to guess, madam, I would say that he is trying to find a loophole, by which he hopes to find plausible cause to shut down our little club here.’
‘Shut it down? But why?’
Rudy smiled amiably. ‘Doubtless that will become clear to you the more you visit and the longer you stay. If the first rule is sufficient for you, then, I direct your attention to the little white door at the end of the hall directly behind me. Once you find a way through that door, you are considered in complete harmony with the energies which fuel the creative spirit, which in turn fuels our entire operation.’
Operation?
‘Operation, process, endeavor, journey, and economy are some of the interchangeable terms. Each was, is, and will always be true.’
‘How are you reading my mind?’
‘Again, sir, that will become clear to you the more you visit and the longer you stay.’
Janet tugged gently on Jim’s arm. Jim gave a resigned sigh, and allowed himself to be steered down the hall to the little white door.
‘There’s no doorknob, Jim.’
Jim pushed. The little white door would not budge.
‘I think you were right, Janet. We’ll have to take it on their terms.’
They retreated a few steps.
‘Mmm. So what do we do?’
‘Rudy said ‘in complete harmony with the energies that fuel the creative spirit.’ I suppose the more creative we allow ourselves to be, the closer we come to complete harmony.’
Janet’s eyes seemed to lose their focus as she looked at him.
Jim was still musing on what it would take to be completely creative.
‘All creative geniuses, the ones whose creativity changes the world, believe that anything is possible, that our only limits are those we give ourselves, and that the way to succeed is thus to remove all our limitations.’
‘Jim! That’s it!’
‘We can do anything.’
‘So there are no real barriers!’
‘Which means that there is no door!’
An intense wave of euphoria swept over them. Hand in hand, they walked quickly to the door, kept walking, and passed through it as though it wasn’t there.
‘Because it isn’t,’ Janet smiled.
‘You’re reading my mind,’ Jim smiled back.
‘I like this place already.’
They both turned to look at the Word Club.
‘Whoa…’ Jim breathed.
Janet was momentarily speechless.
Before them lay an expanding panorama. Grass, flowers, and trees of all kinds grew rapidly before their eyes. Plains and mountains, plateaus and canyons, mighty rivers and beautiful streams as far as they could see.
And we can see as far as we want to, Jim.
Yes, and in as much detail as we want to!
Jim shook his head, struck by a thought. This is The Word Club?
Yes, sir. This is a club where words come alive.

Rudy? Is that you?
Yes, sir. I am part of the Word Club, after all.

8:06 PM

Miracles bursting before One Poet's eyes. She has my Lily's Hazel Eyes; those eyes that shined like diamond's long ago...